Just start.
That seems to be the theme of my life recently. Just start, just do it and it will be okay. Whether it is raining, or I am tired, or anxious. I spend too much time in my head thinking about all of the things I want to do, instead of taking any sort of action. I think my way into plans just as easily as I think my way out of them. Simply taking the first step can sometimes be the most important part of the journey. Every great invention started with the first step, every great book started with the first word, so on and so forth.
So why do I find it so difficult to take the steps in my life that I know will make a positive impact? Not just me, but I’m sure the million and one other people out there that surely have ideas and simply don’t start? Personally, I have blamed my external circumstances, or my anxiety.
On and off for my whole life I have struggled with managing my anxiety. A few months ago it got to the point where I could not function in my day to day life. Before that, I always had a notion in my head that I would start when the circumstances were right, when I had money in my savings, when I found the perfect gym, or when I no longer had anxiety. So when I was unable to do simple tasks without a full blown panic attack, it came to doing one thing at a time. Get dressed, then make breakfast. Go outside to watch the birds for five minutes. Make a cup of tea. Moment by moment decisions to take away the pressing weight of having to manage an entire day. Then I got comfortable doing the minimum. It was now my routine, and to go outside of the routine that has not triggered major anxiety seemed terrifying. Being comfortable in life was what mattered, and anything deviating from that would surely cause me anxiety.
That line of thinking has trapped me. It has trapped me in a perpetual cycle of not doing because I am comfortable where I am at, and doing anything outside of that is uncomfortable.
Going outside your level of comfort is where real change starts to happen though. To live a decent life I don’t really need to make any changes. I have a roof over my head, I have an income, and I have friends and family that love me for simply being me. But, I want more from life. I know on a very deep level that this is not where I am meant to be stuck at, and there is so much more out there if I simply am able to take one step at a time out of my comfort zone. I can still take it moment by moment, but the actions taken in those moments can be different. The action I choose to take at any given moment can be different.
By thinking my way into problems I have created a mental loop of always analyzing everything before starting. It has become abundantly clear to me that this is not the answer. My brain is capable of amazing achievements, as is everyone else’s, but sometimes we need to step outside of ourselves and just start.
Taking the moments before starting something new to just be present for a breath, to sit uncomfortably and allow that unfamiliar feeling to be okay, and to not immediately react. Having a vision and a goal and sticking to it instead of thinking yourself out of it. For something so seemingly easy, it proves to be incredibly difficult.
I am convinced that is where real progress is made, where the beauty lies, and life awaits unbounded by the restrictions we place in our own minds. So it might not be the easiest of journeys, but it will be one without regrets and limitations.
Just start, and the magic of the universe will follow you moment by moment.
